So, it’s Halloween – a holiday who Hallmark has turned into a candy carnival – and unfortunately it’s a bit brisk and rainy. But don’t sweat the sweet stuff. Stay toasty in these tasty threads from Rock Steady.
[$48 candie cardigan at shop.steadyclothing.com]
As a follow-up to my aforementioned birthday activities, I found myself contemplating the often 1920’s or ’50s style of the burlesque babe. I mean, they don’t really wear a whole lot, so in terms of actual items, the few things that automatically come to mind are boas, boobie tassels, and loosely lost lingerie. With the latter two born in eras where newly discovered synthetics were widely used, I went on a mission to find some fun faux boas. ‘Cause real ones just aren’t cool. Most I came across seemed to be lacking a little something, but then I stumbled upon a whole slew from The House Of Bachelorette. Prince charming and engagement rock sold separately.
Yesterday, I reached the quarter of a century mark in my life, so I thought why not celebrate French Quarter style with a risque burlesque extravaganza – except this one was a little less overblown, a whole lot more modern, and located in the East Village.
I didn’t have overly high expectations for the little dive in Alphabet City, but I was immediately taken by Bar on A with their orange and black decor, complete with synthetic snakeskin detailing around lights, poles, and other subtle spots. It was casual with no cover – and the show only had a $5 buck bill.
I had already decidedly given the Kitty Nights gang of girlies kudos for the super catchy catty show name. There were the usual scenes – a mix of sultry and silly, which I quite enjoyed. Plus, this particular night also included a special act by the fierce little lady who ran the show – Ms. Fem Appeal. While I’m not sure exactly how I felt about the Little Red Riding Hood reenactment, I can safely say the fur costume that was flung around were totally faux. And what a fabulous time it was overall. The motley musical selection combined with a little bit of glamor, sauciness, and striptease was just the right amount of entertainment and excitement I was looking for to take on the big two-five.
Here, kitty kitty…
It was time.
Actually, for the third time that season, it was time. The dreaded closet clean-out – an activity that every shopping addict hates. In a squalid attempt to inspire myself, I turned to the experts: Finola Hughes, Tim Gunn, Stacey London, Clinton Kelly, and any other wardrobe editing expert I could think of. But have you ever actually read any of their essentials lists? Smart, sure. Practical – how about impossible. Who really has a total of 10 pieces in their wardrobe? Certainly not me. And if you’re reading this, my guess is probably not you either. Plus, sometimes it can be extremely difficult to give some items the boot. There’s that history together, the emotional attachment, the dependency, and those intimately shared moments of retail therapy. So how exactly does one do it when working with such volume? Well, I can’t exactly explain how I got through it all. But I can tell you what I ended up with. Being both a virtually unstoppable overstock-er and OCD organizer times ten, I decided my leftover items not only needed to be cherished, but also charted.
Or at least that was the original plan. My so-called attempt at a “retail run-down” list failed miserably as I still seriously had too many items to count. Sickening, but even so, severely less than I started out with. And although I don’t like to play faves(yes I do), I’m clearly a heavy hitter when it comes to scarves and cardigans. They’re so essential and multi-seasonal! But if you’re more of a well-rounded gal, it’s probably worth it to leaf through The Lucky Shopping Manual for some solid advice.
The upside of this whole experience, aside from some extra closet space, is that it left me a little more uncertain about my next sure-to-be-unnecessary splurge. I’ve learned it’s ok to swear off swiping some platinum level plastic for a bit and forget this weekend’s purely impulse fashion fix because I got everything I need right here.
*Warning: Do not attempt this stunt at home, unless properly supervised and armed with aftercare items such as extra creamy cake batter ice cream, mellow-out music, and a credit card shredder.
I used to be pretty down with Three Dog Night, but after my recent search and rescue request mission for a size 11 heeled vegan boot, I must seriously disagree with them about one being the loneliest number. I think my pal/web designer extraordinaire Jenn Schiffer can definitely attest that, in fact, 11 is the loneliest number – or I bet it certainly feels that way when you’re stranded solo in a shoe store surrounded by a sea of sevens and other so-never-gonna-fit-me sizes. Luckily, Moo Shoes stepped out onto the scene at the turn of the century to toss you leggy ladies a life preserver – and a complimentary lesson in size conversion. (An American size 11 equates to a European size 42.) Find my picks below.
…and I swear I’ll stop making silly song puns before the next post (total lie). Check out MooShoes.com ASAP before the size sells out, or if you’re kickin’ it local, stop by their flagship store in NYC.
[$149.95 Elizabeth Boot by NOVACAS at mooshoes.com]
[$139.95 Betty Boot by NOVACAS at mooshoes.com]
List of things to do before I die. Just kidding… dye.
Of course, I would definitely recommend seeing a professional stylist over a home hair dye job, but I get it – times are tough. Ok, so let’s try this again.
List Of Things To Do Before I Dye
Hopelessly lost dragging around an ocean of over-stuffed arm candy? Seeking “multi-tote syndrome” salvation? The answer’s easy ’cause Rock N Moms does all the dirty work for you. Chic looking diaper bags are the latest domestic accessories re-purposed as career carry-alls. So now, you can pack it like a pro, and cut down on the fluster your morning commute causes. They’re a far cry from the mostly mundane, usually leather briefcases that leave little room for more than a laptop. I’m a fan in particular of their Jett’s Red Skull Tote. The 12×15x4 plastic-coated fabric bag boasts over 12 compartments and an awesome amount of extras. The pacifier pouch is the perfect place to store a pillbox or compact. And it even has an insulated [water] bottle holder, which saves my steno pads from sogginess and condensation. I’ve managed to make use of every single facet except the changing mat and stroller straps. The stoplight red exterior gives it that power color punch, while the subtle skull design remains edgy without being in your face. It’s not only my portable personal assistant but my purse as well, making it my solo shoulder mate for the day. *Disclaimer: Take charge ‘tude not included.
[$75 at rocknmoms.com]
You bet I just ripped off the title of one of NYC TV’s hippest shows. But they can keep their clever concept, because I’m talking dress codes – not zips. Along with a few beauty bonus perks, my swanky new gig also came with a prescribed apparel policy: put-together, professional, and predominantly black. While the hue played right in to my usual palette, I was sort of lacking in the adult-age attire. But with a little help from my go-to online gallerias, I was able to assemble a working wardrobe that actually worked for me.
And when I’m feeling extra fierce, I like to jazz up my basics easy-bake style with man-made synthetics from Hollywood Mirror. Every modern maven needs a punchy power tie and trendy belt to secure her smart status.
Now you got it, girl. And I think I’ve got it down too. Just one quick tip for sure success: Don’t take any lip – unless it’s from New York Color (or maybe a critical client – P.S. they all are) – ’cause they know what they’re yappin’ about. N.Y.C.’s Retro Red lipstick sends me off with enough moisture and shine to make it through my dizzying day. And although they put in a lot of lab time in order to pop out these top-notch tubes, they never test their products on animals.
[$41 Liquorbrand cardigan at greasegasandglory.com, $15 cap-sleeved shirt at oldnavy.com, $39.50 low-rise trouser at delias.com, red leopard tie and silver skull belt at hollywoodmirror.com, $0.99 ultra-moist lipwear at newyorkcolor.com]
In addition to my reoccurring “Faux Find” and “Chinese New Year” themed posts, I’ve got a seriously savvy new series to add to the mix. “Calendar Crunch” is your virtual alert to pull out your appointment pads and clear your schedule for some lovely, local, and/or pet-friendly priorities. Consider it your introduction to the life of a socially conscious socialite. I’ll be giving you the what, where, when, and what to do next – register, RSVP, pencil it in, possibly make a purchase, take a peek at your e-mail, or turn your little peepers towards some massive media coverage. No place to jot it all down? Try The Great Elephant Poo Poo Paper Company’s Notebox (yup, you read right – elephant poo poo), available at their online Poo-tique. The paper promotes sustainability and a portion of the profits support elephant welfare and conservation programs.
[$12.99 at poopoopaper.com]
